At any given moment an act, an idea or an spoken word sparks a response within yourself whether it be positive or negative. The simple question of “where will I receive mail” has moved my normal pleasant continence from content to dishearten. For the first time in such a very long time I feel tired.

It’s not often that I find myself empathetic with the weather but today it feels as though the wind that blows and rain that falls seems to emulate my thoughts and feelings. The brash movement of the wind personifies the unrest I feel about my current circumstances and the explosion of moisture from the sky mirrors that of the tears I try to hide.  I look out the window and envy Mother Nature for her ability to show thoughts and displeasure of her current circumstances while I try to hold mine in check.  

Circumstances have forced relocation for our family and once again it is time to move, venture forward into the unknown to build a life in a new community. Although many of the past moves I have felt excitement and was enthusiastic about the transition I must finally admit to myself that the upcoming departure from my current home has left me somewhat melancholy. When I evaluate this feeling I realize that it is not the relocation or new place that I will go, but that lack of knowing where and when I will actually get there.

Past relocations have been much easier, even though I was the one who made all the arrangements, packed all the items, and did the necessary work to have the move run smoothly, I knew where I was going and had a place to call home when I arrived. In addition, each day I had my husband by my side as my support system, and I his, and together we managed to make the new house a home and build relationships in our new community.

 This relocation is a vast departure from those in the past, first I am not actually leaving the area. The impeding move has me abandoning the comfort of my home, renting it to strangers, moving myself and beloved pets in with friends all the while residing over 100 miles away every Sunday through Friday is my daily support system. It what seems like a mere moment the security that I had come to rely on has vanished and my daily life has become incredibly completed.

A glimpse into my impending future where each day I get to look forward to rising one hour earlier and arriving at the place I will reside one hour later all the while, having to maintain the pets, monitor the finances, work fulltime, solve health issues, find a new job, and balance independent family lives in hopes that soon the we can be rid the bacheloresque lifestyles and once again be a couple under a single roof.  

Does it sound so terribly selfish to speak aloud the thought that one needs something in which to look forward?  Is the want to have a place to surround one’s self with husband and family out of the ordinary?  Can it be wrong to want to have some type of stability in life?  At this time I will let the rain fall but know that soon I will use the reflections from today to bring back spring and the rejuvenation of hope.

Small Blessings...

The questions…

What is it that gives a family hope? How do a husband and wife bind together to face adversary in these economic times? What can a parent do to keep their children joyful when they are forced to go without the luxury items that all their friends have?

The woman…

These questions rang through my mind last evening when I had the distinct pleasure of meeting a remarkable woman who has held her family together and prospered even though her husband was out of work for over a year. Even more amazing is that she didn’t know that others could be inspired by her success and poise of how to handle adversity during an economic catastrophe.

The story…

I quietly listened as she began her tale that started when her husband, the sole financial provider for the family, was laid off from his position. I heard the underlining stress in her voice when she spoke of how the at home jewelry shows sales along with the meager unemployment stipend kept the family fed and housed. I saw the stress lines embedded in her brow when she spoke of the family car that her husband was using to search for a job stopped working. I felt the emotion of enduring love when she spoke of caring for her children and how her and her husband had switched primary caregiver roles. I reveled in the proclamation that her husband’s persistent and painstaking search had been fruitful and he had found a position and would be starting his new job soon.

The conversation…

At the end of her story we spent a few moments talking about what matters. How the smile from her children brightened her day, how she no longer takes things for granted and how she is thankful for the family and friends she has in her life.

I noted that it was nice to see her appreciate the small blessings she received everyday. How it was wonderful that her husband had after a year of searching found a position and that her family seemed to be stronger for surviving the ordeal. How I was in awe of the courage and composure she maintained during the difficult circumstances that had taken place and was amazed that she still found time to volunteer to help others in the community.

The surprise…

Looking at her face I witnessed the transformation from revelation, consideration to realization and knew instantly that she had never thought about the situation in this manner.

The small blessings…

I knew that today I had listened, sympathized and helped another person who then realized they were more than the trials that they endured each day. That each day we receive small blessings that help us become better people and appreciate those in our lives. Today I am thankful that I met her and that she was one of my small blessings.

As I sit here pondering why is it that when I am busy I get so much more done than when I have lots of free time where I could complete everything on my ever increasingly long to do list and never do.

I take a moment to reflect on time…

When we are young most of us are absolutely dumb struck with how slowly time moves. We want to be able to play catch/football with the big kids, go to a movie with our friends and not our family, find our first boy/girl friend so that we can fall in love and so much more. At this point in our life it is as if time stands still seemingly moving at a turtles pace and never at the fast rate of speed we wanted it to leaving us longing and eagerly anticipate our future events.

Then we grow up, graduate from school(s) and are thrust into the real world where it seems as almost immediately the process of trying to figure out how we can turn back time and at the very least find more of it begins. Gone are the days when you just looked forward to no school or traveling to our grand parents for summer vacation. Now we find ourselves looking for ways to find or keep a job, make payments of those pesky monthly bills and locate a few minutes that can help us to decompress from the days events.

What a difference 10 to 20 years can make on one’s perspective!

An unlikely messenger...

Crossroads in life present a person with the much needed motivation to reflect on what’s important, social responsibility and personal goals.

Currently I am a parent, grandparent, volunteer, student and entrepreneur with a new fledging business. The usiness, which like all good things, began from “necessity” the mother of invention.


BACKGROUND:
Due to my husband’s acceptance of a new position I relocated to Maryland from Florida. Once here I immediately began the process of finding employment. Much to my amazement, with over 20 years of work experience, an associate’s degree and less than two semesters away from a bachelor’s degree I could not find a job.

What I uncovered shocked and saddened me. I learned that regardless of my job expertise I couldn’t get past the HR screening process due to my lack of an advanced college degree. I could run circles around the other applicants yet couldn’t find one company that didnt have computer-less HR screening process and no one would speak with me personally.

I remember watching Glen Beck, when he was mentioning that many people who are unemployed were not included in the national unemployment statistics, due to their classification of unemployedness.

I have a college education and thought I knew what unemployed means. In my world (aka the real world) a person is either employed or unemployed. Who knew that there are subclasses to the definition of unemployed and that are used to make the economic picture look brighter.

Yet for all of this defining and sub classifying it still meant one thing, I was unemployed so I had no income. What I learned was that I was one of the unemployed individuals that does not count as a statistic, I hadn’t applied for unemployment (not permitted due to my relocation) so therefore I meant nothing. I now understood how it felt to be a DC citizen "taxization with our representation" and I live in Maryland.

This made me wonder, how many others out there that don’t count are searching for jobs. This cold reality led me to the belief that competition for available positions was even more intense than I originally thought.

Undaunted and up to the challenge, next I attempted to make contacts in my new area through the use informational interviews. I managed to schedule some appointments and secured some wonderful new connections. These individuals helped me to refine my future resume for when I achieved my degree along with a watered down version to use now to apply for other positions, mostly administrative, as a way to get into the system.

Interestingly enough, the last informational interview I attempted caused me to rethink and invent a position for myself.

A higher education administrator wouldn’t even meet or speak with me until I provided a more thorough explanation of why and how I got the persons name. This person’s response to my e-mail request was so condescending and curt that I immediate sent back a thank you for your time note and began to consider alternative ways to make a living.


A BUSINESS IDEA
“Necessity” and two very good bottles of pinot noir had me brainstorming with my husband about how I could generate income. The strategy session was the beginning of the planning process and led to the formation of company, Browning Global Solutions, LLC.

We created a small business that would permit me to work virtually for businesses and individuals providing them services that range from administrative, client retention, marketing, social media, research and more. Now I just needed clients.

Work that contact list…

Networking is one of my favorite terms and in my case helped to find a way to gain attention to the new business. I was able to make some calls and found my first client. A serious Yahoo Moment for me. The next client came through my daily scanning of craigslist and my third from a friend whose daughter started her own company in the UK.

I couldn’t believe it within a short period of time I was the CEO of an international business.

As with any new small business, at the beginning the owner finds that it boils down to me, myself, and I performing all the work. This was okay (not fine – we all know what fine actually means), I have a bit of perfectionist in me so I wanted to have control over quality.

Yet due to the nature of my business I had limited contact with the outside world. This is in direct contrast to my perfectly perky personality that needs some type of social outlet. I can tell you that the dog is not a good conversationalist. I was beginning to have doubts and wondered if I had done the right thing.

THE MESSENGER
They say, which I believe, that in life God sends you someone to help you realize that you are on the right course or steer you down the right road. In my case, my messenger was Federal Government.

That’s right, pick yourself up off the floor I said the Federal Government.

God sent me an HR manager who worked for the Federal Government to contact me for an administrative position in DC. I had always thought God had style but now I knew a sense of humor could be added to his list of character traits.

IS THIS THE RIGHT THING TO DO
I listened to the representative and even completed the paperwork that was required but couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to seriously reflect on this opportunity and the direction of my career. I came up with a few key questions to help me.

• Would this position help me to achieve my career goals?
  
• Is a 9-5 administrative job the type of position that would challenge me to be the best person I could be?
  
• Would it be socially responsible for me to take the position and did the job create an ethical conflict?

My career goals include: owning my own business, finding ways to involve our children in the business, flexibility in schedule, travel opportunities and innovation. Given these criteria the administrative position would hinder my career goals versus help me to achieve them. I would no longer be in a position to help my friends or family find ways to gain income. I would turn into the handout not helping hand person and that just wouldn’t sit well with me.

I like to be challenged and explore new and innovative ways to get work done. I enjoy the use of technology but understand the value of a handshake. I believe that the days of working 9 - 5 are gone; if you want to get ahead you need to put in the effort to succeed. Yet I need the flexibility of being able to change my plans to be there for family and friends when needed. I like to smile. So no, the 9 to 5 job wouldn’t suit my daily routine and the position would not challenge me to strive for excellence.

I have some firm opinions about business practices which include that I think pay raises should be merit based. People should be given the opportunity to lead when they are ready and not from seniority and new ideas explored. This business philosophy could be counterproductive in the government system where many (not all) feel that the government will take care of them for the rest of their lives and there is no reason to try something new when what they are doing works just fine (we all know what fine actually means, don't we)


THE RESULT
Reflecting on my questions and the answers, today I sent off the notice to my messenger, the HR person, explaining that I had accepted a position with another organization.

This is true, for today I accepted that the fate of my career lies in my own hands. That the success of my company depends on us, my husband and I, and by being forward thinking, goal oriented and socially responsible I could achieve my career goals and more.

Going forward I offer that the old adage of adapt improvise and overcome has been revamped and modified to a more modern statment that works for my situation.

accept, invent and succeed

Finding motivation

Often a person comes to a point where they just have to wonder, do I really need this much stress in my life. Which is normally accompanied with the feeling that a lot is getting done but none of the tasks are being done very well.

Life for me lately has included managing a new home, helping our children and grandchild, making sure that my mother has what she needs, starting my own company and going to college fulltime. Alone each one of these tasks have the possibility of making a perfectly sane woman loose her mind but when combined can overly challenge even the most organized female.

I must admit I am one of those women who began to question what the heck I was doing and how I could possible get all of this work completed. The sheer magnitude of what I needed to do was becoming overwhelming and I wondered if I shouldn’t just turn on the TV and watch the HGTV channel all day, it would be a make for a much simpler and uncomplicated life.

Unfortunately this new mental state began to reveal a chink in my otherwise solid armor of perseverance and persistence.

The breech showed in my lapse in accomplishing tasks focused around my college coursework. I received a paper back from a very professional and caring professor that noted my uncharacteristically lack of writing talent all the while I was struggling with completing other assignments for several other courses.

What would it take to snap my out of my doldrums and bring back the spark of initiative that propelled me to be the best?

The United States Postal Service to the rescue…

Today I received a priority mail box, thinking the package was for my husband I began to sit it on the table for him to open later when I noticed that it had my name penned in the address label. The slightly battered box was from VCSU bookstore.

Slicing open the box I thought what could this be? Then I noticed the neatly wrapped package and saw a graduation ensemble that consisted of an ebony cap, gown and tassel with the number “10” in gold.

Tearing open the plastic packaging I grasped the silken gown and held it up at arms length; it looked to be a perfect size. Next out of the box was the black cap, pretty generic as far as graduation caps go but inside you could see the word “congratulations”. Finally I took out the tassel. It was a jumbled mess of black strings that needed to be straighten out, but when hand combed with the fingers turned into a talisman which now hangs on my computer to protect me with against the lack of motivation demon that recently plagued my home. Finally I found my inspiration to help me back on the road of initiative and success.

My newfound inspiration brought forth from my memory the saying “you have to think outside of the box.” I reflected for some time on the old adage and found that there is something missing from this guiding verse. So I offer the following revision

“You need to look inside the box in order to think outside of it”

My Cap and Gown

I have just purchased my cap and gown for my graduation from VCSU and can hardly believe that I will soon be traveling to North Dakota to walk across the stage to receive my diploma / bachelor’s degree.

This simple act of contacting a very pleasant person at the VCSU bookstore that helped me select the proper size graduation attire and didn’t even wince when I asked for it to be shipped to Maryland has me reflecting on all the positive people, staff and professors, I have encountered at this university during my tenure.

Who would have thought that when I first found the online professional degree program at VCSU that I would have also found an institution with a soul and whose commitment to students and their learning experience was so profound.
I should recognize my friend Colleen from Florida for her glowing referral of the university. Her husband was a former professor at VCSU and she couldn’t say enough nice things about the people who work at the university. As we all know, it is the people and their commitment to learning / teaching / customer service that makes a student’s higher education experience worth while and memorable.

What I should mention is that I am a non-traditional student. I register, receive counseling and attend class virtually. Yet from the moment I began the process to attend this university I was never treated as a second class citizen, it was clear that I mattered. When I was in the application stage at VCSU I received constant updates and phone calls to let me know where I was in the process and what steps I needed to take next. This initial contact reaffirmed my decision to attend this university. What can I say, I believe in communication and excellent customer service of which both were in abundance during this phase.
Did I mention that I have a type A+ personality? That’s right, I’m “perky” with an “I don’t like to lose attitude.” Say it with me…”show me the A.”

Over the course of years that I have been attending this university I have found that the communication got even better. The professors, although firm, also understood and helped guide me through the learning process. The organization of the coursework, clearly stated requirements and objectives along with project deadlines kept my education on track.
Initially I thought that the communication via the internet would be impersonal, I was mistaken. Through my virtual communication with the professional staff and professors at VCSU I feel as though I have come to know each one of them and consider them among my close associates and friends.
As no man is an island, I must add that I could not have traveled my education path alone. I have an advisor who would make many students out there green with envy. She listen’s, follows’ up on her promises, finds me answers to my endless questions and makes sure that I have what I need to succeed at VCSU. She is not the traditional professor / advisor in the fact that she only has office hours and that’s all, she goes above and beyond her role and for that I say thank you.

For those out there that may be considering non-traditional learning to achieve their educational goals or attending a university in the mid-west I would offer that VCSU should be on your list of universities to check out. I have listed a few I can’s below that reiterate my stance on the excellence of receiving my education from VCSU and why I consider, and use, their staff and professors as examples of what is right with a university.



How many people out there can say?

• That they have contacted the registrar’s office and a real person answered the phone and you were able to speak with the registrar who helped you solve your problem? I can…
• That they have sent an e-mail to the registrar’s office and heard back within an hour with a response and resolution to an issue? I can….
• That they can call the bookstore and speak with any of the staff to get the books needed and shipped the same day? I can…
• That they can send off a message to a professor and hear back immediately with a response / answer? I can…
• That they can converse with the Financial Aid Office to find out what they need to do to obtain financial aid and then the office follows up with e-mails and calls to ensure that you understand and are comfortable with the process? I can…
• That they can call or e-mail the business office and talk to a real person, find out tuition payment options and have the person be friendly? I can…
• That they can e-mail an advisor an educational track question at midnight and get a response? I can…
• That they can learn about the other students in their class. That they will know fellow students likes, dislikes, favorite color, pets and much more? I can…
• That they have had a univeristy director offer to take time out of their vacation to visit you and make sure you have the career tools you need to be successful? I can...
• That they can participate in group projects from thousands of miles away? I can…
• That they receive daily updates on activities, university newsletters, invitations to events and much more? I can…
• That the university finds them whether via e-mail, text or phone to let them know about emergency campus updates? I can…
• That the university provides help to the community around them during a disaster; such as the mass flooding that Valley City recently endured? I can

There is so much more I could say about the positives of VCSU but then that would make this a book and not a blog.
Suffice to say that I am thankful that I found a university that has provided me with not only the education I needed but the academic and social networks that rounded out my collegiate experience. Just think, one side step and I may have ended up at another institution where I would have been a number and not a name and my higher educational experience would not have been so rewarding.

Perish the thought!

Yes…Virginia there is a Christmas without modern technology.

One of my Facebook friends reminded me today that there are only
18 days left until Christmas.

Only 18 days….so little time for me to complete my college course work, finish decorating the house, throw two holiday parties, shop for friends and family, complete a freelance research project, and try to squeeze a day trip to New York to see Rockefeller Center.

Where the heck has all the time gone?

Every year I promise myself that next year I will have a plan of action / strategy for success and be well prepared for my favorite holiday.

One would think in this age of digital communications, social media and internet based shopping I would be able to locate all the great decorations for the house, send out Christmas Cards (yes we say Christmas in our house) and shop for the perfect gifts.

Technology is great and I enjoy its benefits everyday yet somehow at Christmas I want things to be more personable and friendly and the computer seems to be a bit more impersonal than performing the task myself.

I want my friends and family to know:

- That I spent the time thinking about them and took great care in preparing a meal or creating a special holiday event versus having a caterer show up at the house.
- That the Christmas card I sent them has a hand written note from our family versus buying the cards with our names printed on them or electronic cards sent to an email address.
- That the gift I handed them was thought out carefully and not purchased on a whim.
- That I still love my mother even though she absolutely makes me crazy with her list of what to do’s.
- That our children understand the true meaning of Christmas and how important it is that we share the holiday together.

Each year technology advances but it still can not take the place of a Christmas Movie night with the family. Watching the classics such as Rudolph, Frosty, Miracle of 34th Street, or It’s a Wonderful Life with family and friends isn’t digital social media but is social.

So for your holiday I wish everyone gifts that enhance their social media and the time to spend with family and friends that will enhance you socializing.

So, Yes Virginia there is a Christmas with out technology.

For those who had never had a chance to read the famous letter to the New York Sun written by veteran newsman Francis Pharcellus Church to Eight-year-old Virginia O'Hanlon to answer her question “Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus”. Yes Virginia, There is a Santa Claus

What to Blog, What to Blog, What to Blog,

For the first time this holiday season I had my OH MY moment. I realized that it is December and Christmas is less than 22 days from now. My mind was a jumble of things I need to do: send a box to our son in Iraq, decorate the house for our holiday parties [yes more than one], finish two papers for VCSU and then the fun task - shop for the kids.

As I sat down to write this week’s blog I have the verse from Let it Snow running through my head and I wondered…

What to Blog, What to Blog, What to Blog?

I searched online for something to inspire me on what to write. I thought to myself what is on the top of everyone’s mind this time of year, Santa – Cards – Friends and Family. So I Googled these key words and found a sited called make your own Dancing Santa Card. The site DancingSantaCard.com allowed me to upload a photo and make a jolly e-card to send to my friends and family. I created one and emailed the link to those in my contact list.

I digress…What to Blog, What to Blog, What to Blog?

The phone rings, it is our daughter with some Christmas hints. Our kids have to have their hints in by a specific date or we buy them what WE THINK they need. She gives me the list with some links so that I can go online to see what she wants this year. I find the items and we discuss others.

I digress…What to Blog, What to Blog, What to Blog?

I begin to wonder how can I tie the holiday season with digital media and social networking and use it in my blog. This is when I have what many would call a DUH moment.

Today I created a Santa e-card that was sent out electronically to friends and family, I searched for gifts online, I searched Facebook for updates on my friends’ holiday plans and I checked the status of those attending our holiday parties from our Evite invitations. Without knowing I just tied the digital age and the Christmas holiday together and found a message for my blog.

The digital age and medical peace of mind

Not long ago I would have searched online to find

• Great recipes
• Places to dine
• Vacation packages
• Best selling novels
• Check my Facebook page

Recently I have used the full resources of this digital age to search the internet for information on Cervical Cancer and Diabetes to help me with my medical piece of mind. Within the last few months several people close to me have been diagnosed with serious medical condition, one with cervical cancer and the other with type 2 diabetes.

These two medical conditions are deemed silent diseases due to the fact that the person may not know that they have the condition until it is too late. This is why most physicians’ suggest that women get annual pap smear and that everyone have a routine physical with blood work.

Thankfully with my online research I have found that both medical conditions are treatable when detected early, although both have vastly different types of treatments. Cervical cancer can be treated with surgery, radiation and if spread to the other areas of the body chemotherapy while type 2 diabetes can be regulated with medication and diet. Yet if left untreated either of the two diseases is left untreated they can result in a loss of life.

Some of the credible sites that I found to learn more about these two diseases are the American Cancer Society and American Diabetes Association. The American Cancer Society’s website deals with all forms of cancer while the ADA only discusses diabetes. Both sites provide explanations of the disease, research taking place, success stories, and support group services as well as hyperlinks to other sites that can provide additional information.

So what does surfing the web have to do with medical peace of mind?

Think back to some of the clichés that we use in modern society. Knowing is half the battle, forewarned is forearmed, live and learn, failing to prepare is preparing to fail and so on. What does this mean? That by knowing what is happening a person can determine what needs to be done to conquer any or either of these two diseases.

The Fan Page and more…

Many of you many have read my previous weeks blogs and Tweets know that I was in the process of creating a Fan Page on Facebook. The Fan Page has been activated and was named Cervical Cancer: Radiation Patients Unite.

This Fan Page was my way of inviting others to see some of the equipment and to learn more about what women with Cervical Cancer endure during radiation treatment. To also provide a platform for those diagnosed with Cervical Cancer along with their friends, family, and associates to talk about the disease and create a virtual support group.

During the research process for finding electronic / digital links to post on the fan page I found that there were a lot of sites dedicated to breast, lung and skin cancer yet very few that spoke about Cervical Cancer. This seems add since the statistics show that 13,000 women each year are diagnosed with the disease. One group that looked to be more Web 2.0 savvy was the CDC (Center for Disease Control) they have a Pod Cast that discusses how getting regular Pap tests can save a woman's life.

The next step…

So let’s see I have blogged, tweeted and created a FanPage on Facebook. The next step is a video for YouTube. When I was speaking to my sister she thought that a it would be nice to see a video that she could watch that would life her spirits not be a doom and gloom presentation. Why not, I created the presentation in power point added some music I purchased and tried to upload. What was I thinking; this was the wrong type of presentation, no PPT or PPX allowed only WMV

This is when I thought that I was going to have to pay to convert the presentation and was wondering what I had gotten myself into. My normal perky attitude had abandoned me, as I scoured the internet to find out how to change the file from PPT to WMV, in its place was the pouty expression of exasperation. Thankfully I found that the wonderful IT person who loaded my computer software had included Windows Movie Maker. I made the changes and uploaded the video. Yahoo we are back in Perkyville!

Enjoy:

Please note that the images were either taken by myself or obtained free of charge from royality-free internet sites. The music was from the CD I purchased "A Tribute to Lurther Vandross" and is not intended for reproduction but merely to enhanace the presentation.