Small Blessings...

The questions…

What is it that gives a family hope? How do a husband and wife bind together to face adversary in these economic times? What can a parent do to keep their children joyful when they are forced to go without the luxury items that all their friends have?

The woman…

These questions rang through my mind last evening when I had the distinct pleasure of meeting a remarkable woman who has held her family together and prospered even though her husband was out of work for over a year. Even more amazing is that she didn’t know that others could be inspired by her success and poise of how to handle adversity during an economic catastrophe.

The story…

I quietly listened as she began her tale that started when her husband, the sole financial provider for the family, was laid off from his position. I heard the underlining stress in her voice when she spoke of how the at home jewelry shows sales along with the meager unemployment stipend kept the family fed and housed. I saw the stress lines embedded in her brow when she spoke of the family car that her husband was using to search for a job stopped working. I felt the emotion of enduring love when she spoke of caring for her children and how her and her husband had switched primary caregiver roles. I reveled in the proclamation that her husband’s persistent and painstaking search had been fruitful and he had found a position and would be starting his new job soon.

The conversation…

At the end of her story we spent a few moments talking about what matters. How the smile from her children brightened her day, how she no longer takes things for granted and how she is thankful for the family and friends she has in her life.

I noted that it was nice to see her appreciate the small blessings she received everyday. How it was wonderful that her husband had after a year of searching found a position and that her family seemed to be stronger for surviving the ordeal. How I was in awe of the courage and composure she maintained during the difficult circumstances that had taken place and was amazed that she still found time to volunteer to help others in the community.

The surprise…

Looking at her face I witnessed the transformation from revelation, consideration to realization and knew instantly that she had never thought about the situation in this manner.

The small blessings…

I knew that today I had listened, sympathized and helped another person who then realized they were more than the trials that they endured each day. That each day we receive small blessings that help us become better people and appreciate those in our lives. Today I am thankful that I met her and that she was one of my small blessings.

As I sit here pondering why is it that when I am busy I get so much more done than when I have lots of free time where I could complete everything on my ever increasingly long to do list and never do.

I take a moment to reflect on time…

When we are young most of us are absolutely dumb struck with how slowly time moves. We want to be able to play catch/football with the big kids, go to a movie with our friends and not our family, find our first boy/girl friend so that we can fall in love and so much more. At this point in our life it is as if time stands still seemingly moving at a turtles pace and never at the fast rate of speed we wanted it to leaving us longing and eagerly anticipate our future events.

Then we grow up, graduate from school(s) and are thrust into the real world where it seems as almost immediately the process of trying to figure out how we can turn back time and at the very least find more of it begins. Gone are the days when you just looked forward to no school or traveling to our grand parents for summer vacation. Now we find ourselves looking for ways to find or keep a job, make payments of those pesky monthly bills and locate a few minutes that can help us to decompress from the days events.

What a difference 10 to 20 years can make on one’s perspective!

An unlikely messenger...

Crossroads in life present a person with the much needed motivation to reflect on what’s important, social responsibility and personal goals.

Currently I am a parent, grandparent, volunteer, student and entrepreneur with a new fledging business. The usiness, which like all good things, began from “necessity” the mother of invention.


BACKGROUND:
Due to my husband’s acceptance of a new position I relocated to Maryland from Florida. Once here I immediately began the process of finding employment. Much to my amazement, with over 20 years of work experience, an associate’s degree and less than two semesters away from a bachelor’s degree I could not find a job.

What I uncovered shocked and saddened me. I learned that regardless of my job expertise I couldn’t get past the HR screening process due to my lack of an advanced college degree. I could run circles around the other applicants yet couldn’t find one company that didnt have computer-less HR screening process and no one would speak with me personally.

I remember watching Glen Beck, when he was mentioning that many people who are unemployed were not included in the national unemployment statistics, due to their classification of unemployedness.

I have a college education and thought I knew what unemployed means. In my world (aka the real world) a person is either employed or unemployed. Who knew that there are subclasses to the definition of unemployed and that are used to make the economic picture look brighter.

Yet for all of this defining and sub classifying it still meant one thing, I was unemployed so I had no income. What I learned was that I was one of the unemployed individuals that does not count as a statistic, I hadn’t applied for unemployment (not permitted due to my relocation) so therefore I meant nothing. I now understood how it felt to be a DC citizen "taxization with our representation" and I live in Maryland.

This made me wonder, how many others out there that don’t count are searching for jobs. This cold reality led me to the belief that competition for available positions was even more intense than I originally thought.

Undaunted and up to the challenge, next I attempted to make contacts in my new area through the use informational interviews. I managed to schedule some appointments and secured some wonderful new connections. These individuals helped me to refine my future resume for when I achieved my degree along with a watered down version to use now to apply for other positions, mostly administrative, as a way to get into the system.

Interestingly enough, the last informational interview I attempted caused me to rethink and invent a position for myself.

A higher education administrator wouldn’t even meet or speak with me until I provided a more thorough explanation of why and how I got the persons name. This person’s response to my e-mail request was so condescending and curt that I immediate sent back a thank you for your time note and began to consider alternative ways to make a living.


A BUSINESS IDEA
“Necessity” and two very good bottles of pinot noir had me brainstorming with my husband about how I could generate income. The strategy session was the beginning of the planning process and led to the formation of company, Browning Global Solutions, LLC.

We created a small business that would permit me to work virtually for businesses and individuals providing them services that range from administrative, client retention, marketing, social media, research and more. Now I just needed clients.

Work that contact list…

Networking is one of my favorite terms and in my case helped to find a way to gain attention to the new business. I was able to make some calls and found my first client. A serious Yahoo Moment for me. The next client came through my daily scanning of craigslist and my third from a friend whose daughter started her own company in the UK.

I couldn’t believe it within a short period of time I was the CEO of an international business.

As with any new small business, at the beginning the owner finds that it boils down to me, myself, and I performing all the work. This was okay (not fine – we all know what fine actually means), I have a bit of perfectionist in me so I wanted to have control over quality.

Yet due to the nature of my business I had limited contact with the outside world. This is in direct contrast to my perfectly perky personality that needs some type of social outlet. I can tell you that the dog is not a good conversationalist. I was beginning to have doubts and wondered if I had done the right thing.

THE MESSENGER
They say, which I believe, that in life God sends you someone to help you realize that you are on the right course or steer you down the right road. In my case, my messenger was Federal Government.

That’s right, pick yourself up off the floor I said the Federal Government.

God sent me an HR manager who worked for the Federal Government to contact me for an administrative position in DC. I had always thought God had style but now I knew a sense of humor could be added to his list of character traits.

IS THIS THE RIGHT THING TO DO
I listened to the representative and even completed the paperwork that was required but couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to seriously reflect on this opportunity and the direction of my career. I came up with a few key questions to help me.

• Would this position help me to achieve my career goals?
  
• Is a 9-5 administrative job the type of position that would challenge me to be the best person I could be?
  
• Would it be socially responsible for me to take the position and did the job create an ethical conflict?

My career goals include: owning my own business, finding ways to involve our children in the business, flexibility in schedule, travel opportunities and innovation. Given these criteria the administrative position would hinder my career goals versus help me to achieve them. I would no longer be in a position to help my friends or family find ways to gain income. I would turn into the handout not helping hand person and that just wouldn’t sit well with me.

I like to be challenged and explore new and innovative ways to get work done. I enjoy the use of technology but understand the value of a handshake. I believe that the days of working 9 - 5 are gone; if you want to get ahead you need to put in the effort to succeed. Yet I need the flexibility of being able to change my plans to be there for family and friends when needed. I like to smile. So no, the 9 to 5 job wouldn’t suit my daily routine and the position would not challenge me to strive for excellence.

I have some firm opinions about business practices which include that I think pay raises should be merit based. People should be given the opportunity to lead when they are ready and not from seniority and new ideas explored. This business philosophy could be counterproductive in the government system where many (not all) feel that the government will take care of them for the rest of their lives and there is no reason to try something new when what they are doing works just fine (we all know what fine actually means, don't we)


THE RESULT
Reflecting on my questions and the answers, today I sent off the notice to my messenger, the HR person, explaining that I had accepted a position with another organization.

This is true, for today I accepted that the fate of my career lies in my own hands. That the success of my company depends on us, my husband and I, and by being forward thinking, goal oriented and socially responsible I could achieve my career goals and more.

Going forward I offer that the old adage of adapt improvise and overcome has been revamped and modified to a more modern statment that works for my situation.

accept, invent and succeed

Finding motivation

Often a person comes to a point where they just have to wonder, do I really need this much stress in my life. Which is normally accompanied with the feeling that a lot is getting done but none of the tasks are being done very well.

Life for me lately has included managing a new home, helping our children and grandchild, making sure that my mother has what she needs, starting my own company and going to college fulltime. Alone each one of these tasks have the possibility of making a perfectly sane woman loose her mind but when combined can overly challenge even the most organized female.

I must admit I am one of those women who began to question what the heck I was doing and how I could possible get all of this work completed. The sheer magnitude of what I needed to do was becoming overwhelming and I wondered if I shouldn’t just turn on the TV and watch the HGTV channel all day, it would be a make for a much simpler and uncomplicated life.

Unfortunately this new mental state began to reveal a chink in my otherwise solid armor of perseverance and persistence.

The breech showed in my lapse in accomplishing tasks focused around my college coursework. I received a paper back from a very professional and caring professor that noted my uncharacteristically lack of writing talent all the while I was struggling with completing other assignments for several other courses.

What would it take to snap my out of my doldrums and bring back the spark of initiative that propelled me to be the best?

The United States Postal Service to the rescue…

Today I received a priority mail box, thinking the package was for my husband I began to sit it on the table for him to open later when I noticed that it had my name penned in the address label. The slightly battered box was from VCSU bookstore.

Slicing open the box I thought what could this be? Then I noticed the neatly wrapped package and saw a graduation ensemble that consisted of an ebony cap, gown and tassel with the number “10” in gold.

Tearing open the plastic packaging I grasped the silken gown and held it up at arms length; it looked to be a perfect size. Next out of the box was the black cap, pretty generic as far as graduation caps go but inside you could see the word “congratulations”. Finally I took out the tassel. It was a jumbled mess of black strings that needed to be straighten out, but when hand combed with the fingers turned into a talisman which now hangs on my computer to protect me with against the lack of motivation demon that recently plagued my home. Finally I found my inspiration to help me back on the road of initiative and success.

My newfound inspiration brought forth from my memory the saying “you have to think outside of the box.” I reflected for some time on the old adage and found that there is something missing from this guiding verse. So I offer the following revision

“You need to look inside the box in order to think outside of it”

My Cap and Gown

I have just purchased my cap and gown for my graduation from VCSU and can hardly believe that I will soon be traveling to North Dakota to walk across the stage to receive my diploma / bachelor’s degree.

This simple act of contacting a very pleasant person at the VCSU bookstore that helped me select the proper size graduation attire and didn’t even wince when I asked for it to be shipped to Maryland has me reflecting on all the positive people, staff and professors, I have encountered at this university during my tenure.

Who would have thought that when I first found the online professional degree program at VCSU that I would have also found an institution with a soul and whose commitment to students and their learning experience was so profound.
I should recognize my friend Colleen from Florida for her glowing referral of the university. Her husband was a former professor at VCSU and she couldn’t say enough nice things about the people who work at the university. As we all know, it is the people and their commitment to learning / teaching / customer service that makes a student’s higher education experience worth while and memorable.

What I should mention is that I am a non-traditional student. I register, receive counseling and attend class virtually. Yet from the moment I began the process to attend this university I was never treated as a second class citizen, it was clear that I mattered. When I was in the application stage at VCSU I received constant updates and phone calls to let me know where I was in the process and what steps I needed to take next. This initial contact reaffirmed my decision to attend this university. What can I say, I believe in communication and excellent customer service of which both were in abundance during this phase.
Did I mention that I have a type A+ personality? That’s right, I’m “perky” with an “I don’t like to lose attitude.” Say it with me…”show me the A.”

Over the course of years that I have been attending this university I have found that the communication got even better. The professors, although firm, also understood and helped guide me through the learning process. The organization of the coursework, clearly stated requirements and objectives along with project deadlines kept my education on track.
Initially I thought that the communication via the internet would be impersonal, I was mistaken. Through my virtual communication with the professional staff and professors at VCSU I feel as though I have come to know each one of them and consider them among my close associates and friends.
As no man is an island, I must add that I could not have traveled my education path alone. I have an advisor who would make many students out there green with envy. She listen’s, follows’ up on her promises, finds me answers to my endless questions and makes sure that I have what I need to succeed at VCSU. She is not the traditional professor / advisor in the fact that she only has office hours and that’s all, she goes above and beyond her role and for that I say thank you.

For those out there that may be considering non-traditional learning to achieve their educational goals or attending a university in the mid-west I would offer that VCSU should be on your list of universities to check out. I have listed a few I can’s below that reiterate my stance on the excellence of receiving my education from VCSU and why I consider, and use, their staff and professors as examples of what is right with a university.



How many people out there can say?

• That they have contacted the registrar’s office and a real person answered the phone and you were able to speak with the registrar who helped you solve your problem? I can…
• That they have sent an e-mail to the registrar’s office and heard back within an hour with a response and resolution to an issue? I can….
• That they can call the bookstore and speak with any of the staff to get the books needed and shipped the same day? I can…
• That they can send off a message to a professor and hear back immediately with a response / answer? I can…
• That they can converse with the Financial Aid Office to find out what they need to do to obtain financial aid and then the office follows up with e-mails and calls to ensure that you understand and are comfortable with the process? I can…
• That they can call or e-mail the business office and talk to a real person, find out tuition payment options and have the person be friendly? I can…
• That they can e-mail an advisor an educational track question at midnight and get a response? I can…
• That they can learn about the other students in their class. That they will know fellow students likes, dislikes, favorite color, pets and much more? I can…
• That they have had a univeristy director offer to take time out of their vacation to visit you and make sure you have the career tools you need to be successful? I can...
• That they can participate in group projects from thousands of miles away? I can…
• That they receive daily updates on activities, university newsletters, invitations to events and much more? I can…
• That the university finds them whether via e-mail, text or phone to let them know about emergency campus updates? I can…
• That the university provides help to the community around them during a disaster; such as the mass flooding that Valley City recently endured? I can

There is so much more I could say about the positives of VCSU but then that would make this a book and not a blog.
Suffice to say that I am thankful that I found a university that has provided me with not only the education I needed but the academic and social networks that rounded out my collegiate experience. Just think, one side step and I may have ended up at another institution where I would have been a number and not a name and my higher educational experience would not have been so rewarding.

Perish the thought!